Rose Lemonade

Bitter becomes beauty again…

About March 30, 2010

I am an adopted child of God – called to be His, before I ever considered giving Him my affection or attention.  He called me Daughter, before I called Him Father.  He loved me first, and I am still learning to love Him.

I have a hard time accepting His love.  I’m a natural skeptic and I’m generally very leery of not getting what I feel I deserve.  He quietly watches me running, hiding or retaliating in fear, like a wild animal.  I feel ugly and morbid and terrible – and I am constantly challenged to remember.  This is especially true lately as I’ve been walking through a 5 year drought – and I’m not even sure I’m able to call Him Father.  I’m not sure I’ve done everything right, and I’m not sure I meet with His approval.

He is a perfect teacher, and He pursues those He loves.  I have only recently turned around to see what I was always afraid to see in His face, which is acceptance.  It caused me to stop – and melt – and feel confident that I finally had something worth saying.


One Response to “About”

  1. Bob Smith Says:

    I like your brutal honesty here Chrissy. Believe it or not, I felt the same way for many years after becoming a Christian, until I realized just how accepted I was the moment God called me “son.” I was struck by this verse in Psalm 18:35 …”you stoop down to make me great.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s